*This post was written in a fit of rage a few days ago, preserved for the sake of maintaining my “dude” image and unleashed today cuz I’m now bored. Just wanted to feel a little happy. 🙂 I am evil… he he!
I have a psycho friend.
Or to be polite, she’s what a shrink would call Obsessive Compulsive Depressive.
She has a blog that throws a pity party every post, often freaking out happy-go-lucky souls as me.
In her blog, she rants about how she was abnormal child who buried dolls, describes her excitement at eating lunch at the cemetry during college, bitches about her parents, her friends, colleagues and her ex-boyfriend, reminisces about a three-year long failed relationship, ruining another three more years of her life cribbing and pondering over it. All in the name of introspection.
For a very brief while, I was romantically interested in her too, absolutely fascinated about how opposites could attract. I would cheer her up when she was depressed and she would depress me when I was happy. Ha ha!
Anyway, soon enough, we realised it did not work and decided to move on.
I moved on instantly, and dated one other girl during the same year.
We continued being friends of course, until she tried setting me up with vague people I was not even interested in. Reading my post below, she thought I really needed a girl and she wanted to help.
I declined her help saying I have someone in mind who I’m sorta interested in. She wanted details and all I said was: She’s a celebration of life. But it’s too early to say anything cuz it’s always nice in the beginning.
She, meanwhile, told me about how she was so freaked that someone she was supposed to be set up with came across her secret anonymous blog. Reading the blog, I mailed her saying it was time she stopped blogging because it was not doing her any good, she was only thinking of depressing things about her life and the morbidity and intensity in her posts would make anyone believe she has a miserable life, which was far from the truth.
I told her people who didn’t know her would think she’s psycho. And it was a very personal email which was supposed to be just between me and her as friends. Cuz as friends, you do think you can tell each other anything you want, right?
She gets sooo enraged and she predictably blogs about that too. And how she has to let an outlet to her bad side. It was cathartic and all. I do see the point. And would have even agreed completely, if her blog was just about that.
And then I read on to find out what really made her upset with me. It wasn’t my email asking her to stop blogging as much as it was about me being interested in someone else.
She says how I’m foolish to fall in love so many times and believe every time that she’s “the one” and similar exaggerated interpretations, which I would blame on her fertile imagination and of course, her mental illness.
Maybe she forgot that it was she who wanted and offered and tried to convince me to meet up with random people she wanted to set me up with, before she found out I sorta liked someone. Or maybe she was just fishing to see if I still liked her.
So I figured Im gonna do exactly what she does with her blog in my blog, for just a post. For catharsis, of course! 😉
I was telling my best buddy about this and asked him: “Is it really wrong to date different people? Is it criminal to get over someone overnight? What’s wrong really if you move on? Is it not right to like someone with the same intensity everytime because that’s the only way I know it?”
And he said the most fascinating thing I’ve heard in a long time. He said: “There are two kinds of people in this world. The ones who, after a relationship, remember all the good things and forget about the bad. And the others who, after a relationship, remember only the bad things and forget the good. We belong to the first. So we get over. The second kind of people never do.”
That was it.
We were the types who seized every moment of the present, lived it to the fullest, celebrating every bit of life and cherishing it everytime we looked back at it. And they were the losers, who wasted their present, looking back at their miserable life, and spending the rest of the time worrying about the future.
We fell in love every single time, the only way we knew to fall in love. Head over heels. Giving unconditionally, no matter what! Without cynicism, without doubt or lack of trust and maybe even without reason.
But that’s what love is. Because, when you do begin to figure out and analyse why you like someone or when you start finding reasons, you will find no specific reason why you like them and a million reasons why it may not work.
Optimists believe that the only thing they need to make something work is love itself. As long as love lasts, the relationship will.
Pessimists do not believe it will ever work. They carry the burden of the past on their shoulder stooping so much that they hardly see the road ahead.
So optimists get over completely, because at the end of the day, they know they did everything to make something work.
Pessimists do not get over, because they brood about things that happened to them, analyse it, dissect it and find faults with others to reason out why things did not work. Out of sheer precaution, they stay around the milestone till it becomes their tombstone. The live waiting for death to come and take them.
Optimists always are willing to learn from their mistakes. So they plunge right ahead, knowing that mistakes were lessons. They move on with life.
Pessimists are happier spending time with their mistakes, sharing their pain with the world, finding people to admire them for it.
I don’t see reason why people should be depressed about silly things as themselves in a country where there are so many poor, needy and deprived people … the Tsunami affected, the earthquake victims, flood-hit people displaced from their homes themselves being happy because they have love and each other.
Maybe our lives are so much more secure, which is possibly why we indulge in the luxury of self-pity.
Oops, I’ve toned down the fury with which I started this post.
But I don’t think she would’ve reached the end of the post anyway.
And if she did, here it is again: Get over it, biatch! Life is too beautiful to keep digging the shit outta the closet just cuz you have a jobless, friendless life.
Remember, you asked for it. And if you do still want to believe you have a different personality online and off it, maybe its time you visit that shrink.
Whoever thought nobody wants their bad side in real life really needs some friends. Or they probably never had friends to share their sorrows with. So keep yourself entertained with your gang of virtual a**lickers who are gonna run the minute they ever spend a coupla hours with you in the real world.
And, No, I’m not giving you or anyone else the option to comment to this post though I’m tempted to link you to this post for the world to get a glimpse into your fascinatingly depressing life. But again, I refrain. Cuz there’s still some goodness left in this world. Smile.