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Review: Fu… Naa!

May 28, 2006 · by sudhishkamath

F***! Naaaa!!

It can’t be true.

It’s like someone pissed all over the RDX and the explosive potential simply goes down the drain.

Agreed Aamir and Kajol are really good but unfortunately, there are more things to cinema than what two actors can do even when you wake them up in the middle of the night.

I just came back from the movie with a very uneasy feeling in my stomach: Whatta huge fuckin waste of a plot!

What could’ve been an intense quirky love story on the scale of ‘Dil Se’ is blinded by a blizzard called The Complete Works of Aditya Chopra and Karan Johar, replete with Antakshari, the annoying cute kid who stops just short of saying ‘Tussi Mat Jao,’ the moment in the rain, Shah Rukh…ooops Aamir thrusting his blessed nose in Kajol’s bosom, the tree that dropped leaves in ‘Mohabattien,’ Farida Jalal… ooops Kiron Kher doing a DDLJ moment, mush, corn and a sack of salt.

‘Fanaa’ was destroyed not in love but right from its inception, in fact right from the title
(You can’t make a film like ‘Fanaa’ unforgettable by just making sure the word ‘Fanaa’ appears 352 times in the film), incredibly unconvincing screenplay (maybe the writer bunked the plausibility and logic class in her screenwriting course), clueless direction (Either Kunal Kohli was smart enough to put the cockroach as a metaphor or was THAT what Anti-Terrorist Squad officer Tabu was after for nearly half an hour after that scene while the terrorist goes singing in the snow and tongue-twisters at that) and even worse editing (agreed Ravi K Chandran comes up with beautiful haunting frames but if you’re gonna keep all that he shoots, your next film will be 10 hours long).

Despite its hurried, slightly flawed ending ‘Dil Se’ was infinitely superior cinema. In fact, it was almost a classic. Hell, it was a classic. ‘Fanaa’ just gives ‘Dil Se’ to new heights.

I don’t want to ruin the only good thing about the movie in this review: The plot, cursed to rot in hell.

So find out for yourself.

Before some psycho/good samaritan smses it to you. I’m switching on comment moderation for this post to avoid spoilers.

P.S: The best part of the experience for me was getting to see the promo of ‘Kabhi Alvida Na Kehna’ and what can I say? It looks like Closer doused with the Karan Johar-Aditya Chopra treatment.

P.S 2: Aamir Khan should retire playing young loverboy (‘Rang De Basanti’ seemed to be a nice swan song to such roles) or get rid of that double chin and the excess fat on his face. The two and a half years he spent on ‘Mangal Pandey’ could have surely been more useful. But I have to say this much: Aamir has balls of steel to play a role like this, that too right after ‘Rang De Basanti.’

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  1. Unknown's avatar 1$ Saint
    May 29, 2006 Reply

    teme abt it…

    n hey u din say kajol looked beautiful n dat in save d movy 2…lolz
    n plz i don think KANK is closer…
    keep karan johar n indian audience in mind…if at all it is…im sending d water proof RDX to karan johar…

    P.S-aamir was always an over rated actor acc 2 me…i wana c him in a mental role where he is dumb….never done dat b4..

  2. Unknown's avatar Nirav
    May 29, 2006 Reply

    😀
    Very similar views on the movie… glad that others also found the kid to be irritating and it wasn’t just me 🙂

  3. Unknown's avatar bharat
    May 29, 2006 Reply

    OT

    pudhupettai review pliss.

  4. Unknown's avatar diva
    May 29, 2006 Reply

    hey… i ve been wanting to watch the movie… now i have second thots.. i thot kajol n amir wud be a terrific pair… and saint… aamiris not an overratd actor, shahrukh is.. o my god… shahrukh’s histrionocs are unbearable.

  5. Unknown's avatar Raja Sen
    May 29, 2006 Reply

    sir, was hoping you wouldn’t have to suffer through this one. what a painful watch.

  6. Unknown's avatar avronea
    May 29, 2006 Reply

    cackle cackle cackle cackle (*dragging self off floor*)must…stop…cackling…(*brief pause*)
    CACKLE CACKLE…!!!

  7. Unknown's avatar Sheks
    May 30, 2006 Reply

    not only aamir.dont u think kajol too’s kinda old?

  8. Unknown's avatar kaynonymous
    May 30, 2006 Reply

    What are you saying Aamir should retire… life starts at 41 for Hollywood actors! Aamir still looks cute and charming! Aamir Khan or Aamir Khan’t can be decided by his fans!

    Nevertheless, any schmaltzy movie in Hindi will be a sure fire hit!

  9. Unknown's avatar sai
    May 31, 2006 Reply

    Hi Sudhish..

    I do not agree with ur review, not with ur comments abt Aamir khan too..Guess u did not do ur homework properly for this movie’s review…anyway..wakeup buddy!!!

  10. Unknown's avatar Anonymous
    June 1, 2006 Reply

    What I could not sit down and write, you’ve done it!!! Ita horrendous movie!!! YUCK!!! What a drag!! And to top it all, some brainless idiots sitting behind me (in the theatre) had to laugh for every f>#$%^$ dialogue the kid delivered!!!!

  11. Unknown's avatar Rahul Srivatsa
    June 2, 2006 Reply

    Quite rightly said….a waste of plot and talented actors. Not much Kajol and Aamir khan could do anyways. Btw did you notice the roles Tabu dons…psychologist, Field agent and a Board room member for the Defence department…Must say that there has been a huge influence of a particular American TV series on Yash chopra. Horrible movie overall!!!

  12. Unknown's avatar Suderman
    June 14, 2006 Reply

    1$saint:
    yes, added it in the review for the paper. and im glad u NOW see how KANK is Closer to Closer than most indian films.

    nirav:
    esp cuz it keeps saying its own name… i wish the kid got shot…

    bharat:
    done. 🙂

    diva:
    sorry… me SRK fan… no support.

    raja sen/superbro:
    welcome back! 🙂 i left you the link to the Superman Returns video blog…
    tell me you checked it out…

    avronea:
    😀

    sheks:
    nope.

    kaynonymous:
    you dint read it properly i said he shd retire from playing youth at 41… and play roles his age… or a little younger is fine…

    sai:
    sorry sir/miss…
    *puts tadpole in teacher’s pants/panties…*

    anonymous:
    next time, carry a gun. 🙂

    rahul:
    yo!

  13. Unknown's avatar Anonymous
    June 20, 2006 Reply

    Loved Sudhish’s reviews of Mangal Pandey and RDB.Hate his review of Fanaa.I’ve read the Hindu review too.Go to topix.net for my reaction to sudhish’s Fanaa review.Fanaa was not great cinema,far from it.But it’s not so terrible either.And anybody who says Aamir’s an overrated actor deserves to be shot.Or preferably tied to a chair and made to watch KKHH or NO Entry or some such horror.

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